God revealed something to me tonight: I’ve been making excuses. I’ve been coming up with reasons. I’ve been claiming my thoughts are acceptable.
He showed me my mistake. And here’s the punchline: He is present in my loneliness.
I know that seems like an obvious conclusion. And it is… in my head. At least for a moment. Then my heart gets involved and, along with my mind, colludes to the point of tricking me.
What are my excuses? Shamefully, I’ve even spoken these out loud.
- “Of course God is all I need, but I’m lonely for someone made of flesh and bones; who I can hold; who I can hear and see and touch.”
Seemingly, I’ve forgotten the first seven words of that statement by the time I make it to “lonely.” Is He or isn’t He all I really need? Well, in the depths of my heart and soul, I have no question that He is all I need. My need for interaction does not surprise God. It does not overwhelm God. It is not too much for Him to handle. It is not beyond His ability to satisfy.
In fact, it is one more moment in life wherein He is still there. He is ready to receive my need for interaction; to receive my need for communion and connection and communication. He’s ready to hang out with me.
And yet, I try to tell myself “it’s not the same.” Itâ€™s so easy to pull the old â€œflesh and bonesâ€ card and claim that He’s not good enough. Where do I get off? How dare I make that claim? As if He could ever not be enough for my needs! That is a bold-faced lie and attack on His character. And of all things, Iâ€™m claiming itâ€™s a need that a mortal, imperfect human being can satisfy. What am I thinking?
- “It’s obvious I need other people because God said it’s not good for man to be alone.”
This one is tricky, because it uses the Word of God. Does that surprise me, though? No. Satan used God’s own words to try to tempt Jesus. It’s so easy to think, “Well, God said…” and thus assume I’m accurate in my conclusions. The problem is that I somehow believe that I actually am alone. It’s true that it’s not good for man to be alone, but I’m not alone. I have so many family members and friends and others who would be so gracious to be there for me. Above and beyond that, I have God. Again, God has supplied my every need and yet I start assuming that He hasn’t supplied because He hasn’t supplied my every want. But to say that I trust God and all He says, is to say that I believe He has given me all I need. And I do.
Here’s the thing: I would make a guess that I’m not the only one who has thought these things. We’ve all been lonely at one point or another, whether it’s for a significant other or for a friend or for some other type of relationship. Maybe you’ve come up with other excuses. I’m sure I have, as well. I’m making it a goal to abolish these in my life and hopefully be aware of any others that come along.
Who’s with me?
One thought on “No Excuse Acceptable”
Summer rush has kept me from keeping up to date on your posts, so I was so glad to be able to come here and get caught up. Thank you for continuing this work. :)
One observation on this post. God Himself chose not to be alone. In fact, for whatever reason, He even decided that He wanted more than just Jesus and the Holy Spirit to keep Him company. So He wasn’t alone, but He wanted more than what He had. (I’m trying to walk carefully here as I certainly don’t understand how or why He did what He did.)
OK, another observation. My heart has always been struck by the words of Jesus in Matthew as he longs to be with the children of Israel. He does not deny his true feelings by saying, “My God is enough.” Yes, his God IS enough, but that doesn’t change the longing.
I don’t know you, but from what I see here, you are not using your lonliness as an excuse. You are not saying, “I can’t give my children this part of me because I’m unfulfilled in my lonliness.” You are lonley. True. And God is enough. Also true. I don’t think the two are mutually exclusive. I don’t mean to contradict what you have heard from the Lord, but I also know that many a person has been tempted by not wanting to be weak before their Lord. You should absolutely run to your God because He is enough, but don’t feel like you have to correct your emotions to be with Him. He can handle it.
Just my two cents, of course. If it blesses you, please take it. If it doesn’t, please forgive me and know that I pray for you regularly.
Your sister in our Lord,