Hope

I find myself filled with lots of hope after today. I can’t even explain why, which tells me that the reason is God. I have gone over all the facts more than I care to admit, even to myself, and I know everything the doctors and nurses have said and I could probably tell you how each one of them expects this to turn out. I only haven’t figured out how God has planned this to turn out.

On Monday and Tuesday, each, we got devastating news of one sort or another. It was crushing beyond measure. Painful. Tearful. Infinitely horrible. With each of those days, I came closer to the realization that this may not end well. But I haven’t given up hope. I couldn’t shake hope with a paint mixer. (And I don’t just say that; I feel like I’ve nearly tried, simply because the evidence seemed so compelling as to the bad outcome.)

In one sense, it’s easy not to give up hope, simply because the hope I have is for something I want. But, it’s also easy not to give up because of the hope God has granted. I hope for a good outcome. And really, there is no outcome that isn’t good because I know God will use this situation for His glory no matter what. I can’t wait to see the way He uses it and I’ve got my eyes peeled every day. I’m hoping, praying, trying to be a part of that goodness He’ll bring. If even one person will begin a relationship with the Lord God Almighty, I know it’s been a success. This whole ordeal will have been a success. I keep reminding myself of that. If you’ve been around, you’ve probably heard me say it. I just hope that I get to see that success, however it happens. Just one person is all it takes. I struggle a lot with God about that, wondering why I might have to be the one to lose something for His gain. I’m still dealing with that, and will be forever (if the worst should happen).

But today, Wednesday, brought back some hope for me and what I want. I can’t explain why. Stephanie had two big seizures in the middle of the night and early morning, and she’s struggled all day with them as the doctor keeps increasing meds. And she still doesn’t respond via cornea or pinched arm (that I’m aware of). She does respond to someone pinching her feet, which is cool. I guess I just have a general sense of things getting better without any concrete evidence. I think it’s the Spirit moving through the people of God. So again, I thank you all for your prayers. It’s working. At least as far as God giving me strength to get through this. It’s working very well. Thank you.

14 thoughts on “Hope”

  1. My verse today on my heart is "no one who waits on the Lord will ever be put to shame." HE is our hope and God in whom we trust! Whatever happens today, you have been a faithful friend of God and His perfect peace is all over you…you've waited and waited, and I pray for more patience for you my friend!

  2. Praise God for the hope only He can give us. Your perspective on all of this is totally from Him. We continue to pray for a miracle for Stepahanie. Praying continually…

  3. I love this post. This is something I always struggle with, in much less serious situations, and it encourages me to see you filled with hope. I will hope along with you.

  4. Brad, Since we heard of Stephanie’s situation we have been praying for Stephanie, you, Brady, Halle and both of your extended families. We are continuing to pray for a miracle. Isaiah 40:31

  5. My verse today on my heart is "no one who waits on the Lord will ever be put to shame." HE is our hope and God in whom we trust! Whatever happens today, you have been a faithful friend of God and His perfect peace is all over you…you've waited and waited, and I pray for more patience for you my friend!

  6. Dear Brad, We have not been introduced face to face but as my brother in Christ, I know your soul. Were I to meet you on the street my soul would recognize yours. That is how we as Christians are connected with each other through the spirit of God. Words and audible sounds are not necessary for our souls to speak to each other.

    This is the same for Stephanie. The living spirit of God is alive in her, speaking to her and bringing to her Godly things and Godly thoughts. When my dad was alive and struggling with dementia I would pray aloud with him. It NEVER failed that during our prayers he would come back to me. His mind would be clear and he would pray out loud with me.

    I’ve been at the bedside of people in comas and have read the Bible to them and prayed with them. Whenever the word of God is spoken and prayers are offered their souls would connect with him & those Christians in the room. We could physically see the response on the heart monitor and the breathing monitor.

    I tell you this to encourage you to reach out to Stephanie through God’s word, praise music and prayer. Bring a radio into her room and tune it to WCRF so that throughout the day her mind and her soul are being fed God’s word and the prayers of His people. Even if the doctors tell you that her mind is gone, her soul is still present. The soul hears, feels and knows God regardless of the physical mind.

    Prayers are living entities – the Bible tells us that they are stored in heaven, forever. The prayers we pray now for our spouses, our children and our grandchildren (whether born or not) will go into the future with them.

    Stephanie may or may not come back to you here on this earth. But while she is here physically, connect with her spirit.

    Your prayer that unbelievers would be affected by your situation and that someone would come to Christ is a righteous prayer. God’s word tells us that the prayer of a righteous man availith MUCH. To avail is to persist and to accomplish the things of God. MANY things of God.

    I am praying for you, your precious Stephanie and your dear children. Emmanuel IS present. He walks with you and he is holding your hands and ministering to the soul of your precious wife. He weeps with you in your time of pain. He cherishes your children and their future. And He NEVER leaves you. He is Emmanuel.

    God bless you.

  7. For all who are reading this blog, ponder this reply deeply. Stephanie and Brad were at my husband’s funeral– their uncle–five months ago. He died in my arms at age 67 with early onset Alzheimer’s and the weeks before I SAW his soul—all else had left- his mind, body,but never his connection with his Lord. The beauty– and reality— of our souls–and Brad’s words shared with us to see Stephanie’s and his are one of the ‘why’s’ Brad has expressed to us of being family–the family of God.

    Brad, my beloved husband of forty-six years last words were “God is in control,honey. Take your time.” This day, this moment is yours and Stephanie’s now and forever and all that is to come. love, Aunt Jackie

  8. Brad, thank you for sharing your heart and thoughts, especially for this meaningful post. I have been praying throughout the week and am continuing to pray for Stephanie and you. Praying to the God who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine.

  9. I wavered about posting the following, but a good friend urged me that it’s still a good idea. Your posts, and learning more about Stephanie and you through them, very very much makes me think of the following song.

    Chris Tomlin – Awakening

  10. Brad,

    We are praying for you, and for Stephanie and for your children. Take care of yourself and take one moment at a time.

  11. Brad, Our hearts are so saddened to hear what you are walking thru right now. Please know our love, thoughts and prayers are with Stephanie and your family. We knew you when you were just a young boy while we were on staff at Parma Hts.Your family has always been very special to us.
    Please remember and I know you know, you will never walk alone…Jesus is right by your side and wants to hold your hand. Isaiah 41:13 I, the Lord your God, will hold your right hand, saying to you, “fear not, I will help you.” Love and prayers, Terry & Janie

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